Faith over Fear. Patience over Frustration. Pain with a Purpose.
“Miscarried Joy” was a tough book for me to read. I cried. I am so happy that the author decided to write this book. Tankika, the author, shared her stories of having three miscarriages. Having a miscarriage is something that never entered Tankika’s mind and it certainly never entered mine. It is beautiful book and great for women who have suffered miscarriage or infertility. She shared her story and gives us a faith filled perspective that can lead us to healing. She shows us how we can turn to God to get through our sadness. I love that Tankika talks about Biblical Women that also struggled with infertility. The book was very touching. Now I that I read this book, I want to share it with others that have had miscarriages or are struggling with infertility.
In Miscarried Joy, Tanika transparently shares her deeply personal and disappointing experiences of losing her babies due to miscarriage. There were times when she felt God was the cause of her pain. However, her journey through the lives of Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, Hannah, Elizabeth and Naomi, revealed quite the opposite – God had allowed her pain for a much greater purpose. Each of these women had something in common: they learned to surrender their will and trust God’s plan beyond the pain. They were pushed to a posture of prayer that led them from questioning God to have total confidence in Him. Tanika discovered that this season of waiting didn’t show up simply to challenge her, but to change her.
With biblical depth, heart-filled transparency and a voice of passion, you will:
- Understand God’s heart in the midst of incredible pain
- Discover the importance of trusting God’s plan over your own
- Arm yourself with the strength to let go of bitterness and comparison to appreciate the beauty of your story
- Learn and implement spiritual principles and strategies to walk boldly in faith
- Embrace God’s delay and birth contentment in your season of waiting
What have you miscarried? What purpose have you had difficulty conceiving? Is it a calling you fear stepping into? A vision that has not yet come to pass? Miscarried Joy has something for anyone who needs help pushing through incredible pain to conquer discouragement, walk in faith and birth their purpose. God’s delay in your life could be a set up for your greatest calling to be fulfilled.
About the author: Tanika Fitzgerald is a daughter of Christ, a wife to her husband, Maurice, a loving daughter, sister and friend. She is passionate about equipping women to grow spiritually, live balanced lives and helping them to become ARMED for victory in every area of their lives. Tanika is the visionary behind ARMED – a publication created to “Spiritually Equip YOU for Victory in Battle.” She enjoys spending time at Lake Michigan, creating memories with her loved ones, reading a variety of books, writing and traveling the world with her husband.
My Story: My husband and I have a 10 year old son together. When he turned a year old, I wanted another little one. I wanted my babies to be close in age….but God had other plans.
In 2007, we decided we wanted to give our son a little brother or sister. I was on and off birth control for various reasons through the years. I was always under a lot of stress when it came to dealing with my family. In 2013, my husband and I decided to move to Florida. We moved to Florida in March….in September I found out I was pregnant! I guess I just had to get away from all of the stress. I was super excited!
My first appointment was when I was about 5 weeks along. I did not have an ultrasound at this point, but went in for blood work and an exam. Everything looked fine. About a week later, I had a “feeling” in my chest. It’s one of those feelings that stops you right where you are. It feels like my heart of fluttering and I have a panic attack. Anyone that REALLY knows me knows that I get these “feelings” when something is wrong. I called my mom and aunt and they said everything was ok with the family. So I blew the “feeling” off.
My next appointment was when I was 9 weeks! I was going in for my first ultrasound. My mother-in-law brought me to my appointment and my husband met us there. They both came in the room with me. I wanted both of them to see the baby’s heartbeat. I had been nervous the whole day! The ultrasound technician began the ultrasound and she seemed to have trouble finding the baby. I remember her asking me if I was sure my dates were right and I told her yes. She left the room for a while and came back. She started the ultrasound again….then I heard those words, “I’m sorry, I don’t see the heartbeat and it is measuring 6 weeks”. The tears began to roll. My “feeling” was right…something was wrong.
I was brought into a counseling room with my husband and mother-in-law and a nurse came in to talk to us. I was told that I would most likely be miscarrying our baby. Over the next week or so…I went in for blood work multiple times. My doctor wanted to make sure that I was in fact having a miscarriage before we had a D&C. I did NOT want a D&C. So at 10 weeks….my doctor told me that he would allow my body to miscarry on it’s own, but if it didn’t happen by 12 weeks I would have to have the D&C. At 11 weeks, I started bleeding and was in terrible pain. I called my husband at work and he had his mom come and pick me up and take me to the ER and he met us there. I was examined and had a ultrasound. Just a few minutes later, I miscarried. It was painful. My blood pressure was pretty low the whole time. The doctor at the ER did his thing to make sure nothing was left behind. He decided that everything was ok for me to be discharged…..but then my blood pressure dropped really low again and I started bleeding a lot more. They started poking me needles because they were sure that I would need a transfusion. I was then transferred to another hospital.
When I arrived at the other hospital one of the doctors from the practice I go to met me there and he said I had to have a D&C. I told him that I did not want it. He said if I didn’t do it….I could die. I still did not want it. I heard them talking about how my husband couldn’t sign the paper to allow it because I was able to make the decision. A few more people came to talk to me and after a few questions from me I signed the paper.
I remember them rolling me into the OR. I was crying….I was having a panic attack. I remember looking at the doctor’s pretty blue eyes and he told the nurse to give me something to relax me. I remember see a needle in the nurses hand and she said, “it’s just gonna be a little pinch”. The next thing I remember is waking up in recovery.
The worst part of all of this was being wheeled out of the hospital the next day with no baby in my arms. It was heartbreaking. Below, is a scrapbooking page that I completed after my miscarriage. It’s been 3 years since my miscarriage and I still cry when thinking about it.
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the Litfuse Blogger program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”